That’s the way one of my first roles was described by my then
supervisor. I didn’t really get on with him, no one did, he was a difficult
person in every way and that was part of the baptism. He came to the conclusion
because I had to work with him on an equally difficult project and one day, he
conceded that my task was indeed a tricky one. We didn’t kiss and make up after
or ever even saw eye to eye but I think there was some element of respect in
the relationship which was good enough. His words have stuck with me ever since
though; baptism of fire.
The phrase baptism by fire or baptism of fire, is a
translation of the French phrase baptême du feu and is a reference to a
soldier's first experience under fire in battle. This is very true of that
period of time and like a soldier, weathering that storm, I came out the other
end a higher ranking officer. It was hard work but it was rewarding. And as
time wore on, it didn’t get any easier, it just got altered. I faced battles that were more suited to my experience;
it was a never ending war but with brief periods of peace in between.
Lately, there is a renewed baptism, though not one of a rookie soldier,
baptism in this case means “to overwhelm with fire (those who do not repent),
i.e., to subject them to the terrible penalties of hell[1]".
This time, it is not the start of something new, the precursor to new beginnings
and all the other wonderful things that are associated with fresh starts, it is
the end result, the final say, it is what happens when the new grows old and
has been riddled with unforgettable mistakes and unforgivable sins, it is the
final baptism. It feels eternal because that is what it is meant to be, another
never ending war but without any breaks to regroup.
[1] It originates from Matthew 3:11. Of this expression,
J. H. Thayer commented: "to overwhelm with fire (those who do not repent),
i.e., to subject them to the terrible penalties of hell" (1958, 94).
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